[ A promotion in the field... Founders, what the hell were they getting into? And why were they in space? He'd almost have expected Jim to remember everything he had, but that doesn't make sense. Why would he? It felt real though. It had to be real. If Jim didn't remember them meeting, then maybe he just hadn't remembered it yet.
It makes sense, in a completely nonsensical way, that these memories are something starring the both of them. Bones hand't even considered the alternative—his first memory starred him and Jim. Was meeting the catalyst? ]
Memories? Like from some—
[ He pauses, because Jim offers the idea of a 'past life' and that would make sense, except for the part where they were in space. And the technology seemed... nothing like this. He's a little curious about who else could be sharing memories like this, but ultimately they have to figure their own shit out, Bones doesn't give gossip too much credit. ]
Well, I sure as hell hope it ain't the future, because things would have to change pretty fucking drastically for you and me to end up in the fucking sky.
[It's not gossip! He got it straight from the source, he's just protecting the people involved in case they don't want just anyone knowing about them sharing dreams and memories and such. Maybe Xenk wouldn't mind, but Edgin probably would. It was important to him that he protect both his current and future Makers.
He shakes his head.]
I don't know about that, I--I... I don't think it's our future so much as maybe a future life? In which I still call you Bones and I'm still Jim Kirk.. which is what seems wild to me. Because I don't think I was a vampire, so how was I still me?
[It would be one thing to look different, to have a different name, but to be exactly the same? To be himself still? But he couldn't have been a vampire.. sure everything was color coded correctly (some medical people were in white and silver, some people in red, gold, and blue, but..) but how could he have that level of a allergic reaction if he was a vampire? To be that winded, to feel his heart racing, blood pumping... "We got to keep your heartrate down" Bones had said as much.
No, he had been alive. ]
I don't know how we get there, but I just.. Maybe this is the something that's drawn us in together, you said you felt we met before, that you knew me. Well, maybe this is it. And that's what's most confusing, how right and real it feels to me.
[ To be totally fair, Bones gets it. He hasn't told anyone about these memories in detail—Lockwood knew that Bones wanted to be friends with Jim because it felt right, and Karma thought it might be destiny, which feels weirdly right, too.
If they were meant to meet in the future, or meant to meet in another life, what did that mean? If they had the same names, and the same faces, what could it be but some strange life they couldn't escape from? Certainly Bones could think of worse things for fate to pull him towards then Jim Kirk, but it's all really confusing and enough to rock a guy's worldview a bit. ]
I definitely wasn't a vampire. It feels different, then and now. I was alive.
[ Which is weird to notice, but also adds some credibility to the chance of it being something in the future. What happens to vampires when they die? Do they get reborn? Fuck, he doesn't want to think about that, it's so damn philisophical. There was no point in dwelling on that—they couldn't change it, whatever it was.
But they could focus on the here and now. ]
I felt it. Wantin' to learn more about you, feeling... you know, like I can talk to you. I know this is it, I've just been denyin' it.
[ He shakes his head. He sounds so ridiculous. But the possibility of their meeting feels inevitable. Getting memories of chasing Jim around only seemed to confirm what Leonard felt when they first met—this man is going somewhere, and I wanna follow him. Even if it meant chasing him down halls or finding out more about why he had a split lip and blood all over his clothes. Even if he was a brat who liked having his neck bit.
Of course, instead of all that, he says: ]
Really are stuck together, huh? If that's another life, or the future... somethin' tells me, this is it.
[Kirk doesn't know exactly what it feels to be a vampire yet, but that was the best explanation he had for why they were the same people still, but they weren't vampires, they were alive... So, how could they be such exact replicas of themselves? Bones still a doctor, Kirk... well what he wanted to be, a leader. Still with the same names, faces, voices, everything. How does that even work? Maybe he needs to research it.
Except not everyone was here or at least the same, Spock and Uhura weren't here, same with Scotty and Chekov... it was just him and Bones. Just him and a man he felt fond of in the memory just the same as he does now but with more.. more time, more growth? Even if he was also super irritated with him at the time.
His head pops up at the admittance though, eyebrows going up, because Bones has kind of admitted something similar, but to full on admit he felt that something too? That Jim wasn't crazy in feeling the pull of.. destiny or some weird crap.
But Bones felt it too, that need to know the other, the instant draw and almost.. comfort to talk to one another. That he's been denying it but not anymore. Not with this shared memory. It wasn't a shared dream, like what happened earlier, no, this was two separate dreams that coincided in their memory.
And then Bones is giving voice to what he's felt for a while. That this is it, this friendship is it, something big and important and just it.]
I told you, I set my sights on you, Bones, you can't even get rid of me in another life. [He gives a delighted sort of laugh and smile, bright as sunshine, right now his death wasn't even on his mind, the fact he isn't alone in this was something worth feeling bright over.]
So, you got promoted and I eventually become Captain, sounds like we'll be working close together, make a good team even.
[ Overwhelmed with existential dread, uncertainty and a million other what ifs that are running through his head, Bones can only default to that place he knows. Anger. Frustration. He rolls his eyes, but there's no bite in it. He said it first, after all. This is it. ]
May as well be a thunderstorm in July for how much I can't avoid you, kid.
[ Jim's smiling like the sun and Bones knows that warmth in his chest isn't from frustration. He's already said way more than he's told most people, always shared parts of himself that he never shares.
He'll freak out about the implications later. For now, hearing Jim laugh and seeing him smile would just have to be good enough. ]
"Chief Medical Officer." [ He says it like he's quoting someone, because he is. At the same time, he's proud of the title. It may not mean much of anything to him, but it's a point of pride to know he was still good at his job in whatever weird future life they had. ] Are we in the military or something? One where everybody wears blue or red?
[There were a lot of emotions running through Kirk, a lot of what ifs and buts, maybes and probabilities, but he doesn't linger on it right now, that was something for him to drown in later, for now he.. he has Bones at least and even if the man is acting angry he can tell there is no bite.
He even chuckles at the metaphor. ]
Chief huh? Then we'll be working real close together. And... I don't know. We all had titles.. Captain, cadet, lieutenant, they spoke like they were giving orders..
[Kirk gets really serious, bringing his hand to his chin as he recalls things, brows pinched a little in thought.]
I think maybe? I mean, the captain, Pike, he was in Gold, so were a few others. So it's not just red and blue. I remember all three colors being in my other memory too.
Captains in Gold. Maybe there is some connection there. Or you leader-types just like lookin' flashy.
[ Another roll of eyes, but there's some comfort in that too. Jim getting serious, the use of titles and order... At least these other memories have things in common with their real lives. Maybe that's not so bad then. Whatever it was, maybe it would be fine.
It'll be a puzzle to put together, something to pull apart and make sense of. ]
Hold on, I thought you said you were captain? Who's Pike?
When you're chasing me around on the ship, I'm just a cadet, I'm not captain yet, Pike is.
[It was confusing for him too because in his other memory he is captain, he was responsible for everyone and everything that was happening, he had to save his crew even at the.. sacrifice of his life.]
I become Captain at some point, but I'm not sure when.. I'm captain in my other memory the one where.. Well, you saw it. A warped nightmare version of it. You weren't actually there, in the real memory.
[He swallows and feels a heavy weight on his chest again at the thought.]
I don't know where you were. Hopefully somewhere safer than a dying ship.
[ Bones nods. That makes sense, that Jim would still be a cadet while he was doing shit like that. Leonard would hope that the kid would calm down between then and whenever he became captain of a ship.
Still, talk of the dream sobers Bones up pretty quick. If he had to guess, any situation where Jim dies probably means Bones couldn't stop him from doing something stupid or reckless. That, or maybe he just wasn't on board? He'd guess he was dead maybe, but who can say? Had Jim's sacrifice for the crew included him? Could he really think that sacrificing himself would be worth it?
It's a can of worms he doesn't wanna open too much. ]
That's a real shit memory.
[ Not the worst way to die, if he's being honest—saving other people is the best reason to, at times, but if you ask Bones he'd rather save people and avoid an untimely death. He still doesn't know Jim well enough to guess what he was thinking. All he can do is bring an arm around Jim's shoulders, pulling him into a half hug. ]
Hey, at least in this life, you're not gonna die permanently. Us vampires get to cheat death.
[ It's pretty great!! Except for the shitty parts, but Bones is trying to stay positive here. Which is how you know he cares about Jim—he's a real negative Nancy with most people. ]
[Kirk laughs, though a little humorlessly at the summation that Bones offers, because yeah, it was a real shit memory. Yet, it wasn't. It was worth it to save his crew, to save his friends and loved ones. He remembers looking at Spock and thinking "I saved him" and the satisfied way it filled his heart with warmth.
He knows he would feel the same way about Bones and saving him. The relief he felt when Spock told him the ship and crew were saved. It was terrifying but worth it. And what a weird feeling that was, but he can still feel that mix of emotions in his chest when he thinks about it.
It makes his Becoming something he's dreading.. to die again.
Again.
The half hug is surprising, but he returns it, leaning into the hug and resting his head against him.]
Yeah.. yeah you're not wrong.
[He gives Bones a cheeky smile, more to cover up that the idea of dying in general scares him.]
Plus, I get to bother my favorite doctor all the time. I'm looking forward to it.
[ One day Bones is gonna remember Jim's death and he'll have a lot more to say than just this. But for now, he's got his bedside manner, and he's got his friend, and if death is coming, then they'll just get past it.
Clearly, death can't stop them because they can't read. ]
Yeah, lucky me.
[ Bones rolls his eyes but he gives Jim a squeeze. A physical reassurance if nothing else. It's all he can do, when there's so much uncertainty. He doesn't know what any of this. means, what a shared life in space might have to do with where they are now.
But an eternity with his friend—maybe even his best friend, even if they're both vampires, well. That sounds pretty nice, he has to admit. ]
Better not get injured just so you can come see me. I have office hours, you know.
[ As if Jim needed office hours to invade Leonard's space. Psh. ]
Edited (besties (last one I promise) ) 2024-02-23 21:03 (UTC)
[Kirk leans into the squeeze, squeezing the man back in return. Because he really cares about him, this crotchety old doctor has really become someone he care about so dearly and it's so weird for him. Sure, he sometimes finds someone and attaches to them like honey, but that only really happened with a couple people in his life.. and one left and the other is his maker, so the fact it happened with Bones? Well.. he's glad it did. He's glad there is this pull between them so he could meet this amazing man.
And the fact that Bones barely tried to push him away before also giving in to this feeling, before giving into the pull between them? It just made Jim want to stick to him even more.
Bones wasn't doing himself any favors being nice to this idiot, he would never get rid of him at this rate.]
Uh-huh, office hours, we both know those don't apply to me. [Grin.]
But just for you, I won't go looking for trouble, I'll let it find me instead.
[ But he smiles as he says it, somehow warmed by the proximity, even knowing what a headache Jim Kirk can be. He can't imagine getting rid of him now, can't imagine not having him in his life even with just the few things he remembers before. Something about this kid, underneath all his bluster, was worth keeping around.
He doesn't even deny the thing about his office hours. Those never apply to the people Bones actually likes.
They were always going to meet, whether in this life or the next. Strange fucking feeling, but at least they weren't dealing with it alone. ]
Try and do it for your hot maker too—even if somethin' tells me trouble an' you are old friends.
[ He elbows Jim in the side, playful more than anything. Oh, you're in trouble now, Jim. If you've made it to Bones actually getting playful, there's simply no escaping him. ]
And if you tell Edgin I said he's hot, I'll find my biggest needle to stab you with next time you end up in the infirmary!
[Yep, Kirk doesn't hear any denial about what he says about the office hours, which gets him to smirk knowingly. Because of course Bones likes him enough to be willing to see him outside of office hours.
He laughs when Bones calls him and trouble old friends. Honestly, he likes Bones being playful, it felt right.]
Of course I try to stay out of trouble for my hot maker, and I promise, I won't tell him. Though he would be flattered to know.
[A pause and then he's grinning this time, like the cat who got the canary]
Wanna see my mask? I'm told it looks like a slightly younger, less sad Edgin.
[ Brat and your special perks, smh. Bones grumbles elbowing Jim again. ]
He's just a friend! Like you.
[ That's not a "we'll never have sex," in fact it's the opposite considering how Bones feels about Edgin, but don't worry about it. If they're just messing around, then that's good. It feels nice. Bones hasn't really had a friend like Jim... ever, if he thinks about it. Maybe in that other life? But it was Jim, wasn't it? ]
Sure, let's see it. Though for the record, Edgin pulls off sad really well.
He really does, doesn't he? Makes you want to kiss him better, right?
[He gives Bones a wink before taking a deep breath and focusing. It's obvious he's not quite got masking down as easily as some, still learning it and all. It was so easy to do it drunk but it was harder sober.
But after a moment of focusing he goes from being 21 to 30 something in age, his hair a little longer and his eyes bright human blue. He looks aged for sure, like he has life experience and weight behind his eyes and in the lines of his skin, not Edgin levels, but there is a similarity that's more noticeable now that he's a little older looking. But he's still undeniably Kirk.]
[ Bones snorts. It does make him want to kiss him better, so to speak. But in the way that he would—which is to say, by holding Edgin close and embracing him, maybe kissing the back of his neck or just... being there. He'd be so—goddammit, not the time.
Stupid Jim making him think about Edgin. The mask certainty doesn't help with that. Bones watches the change, curious despite his fake qualms. Jim is getting the hang of these things, it looks like. ]
Not bad.
[ Understatement. It's uncanny. It hadn't really occurred to Bones to think about the resemblance, but seeing it now it's undeniable. He knows they're not father and son, but damn. Is this why Bones is attracted to both of them? Is he weak for blonds with thick eyebrows and nice lips? Jim looks older than he was in his memories, too. The age looks good on him. Not that Bones will admit that.
His stare, and the way he looks Jim up and down, maybe even licks his lips, should make his real thoughts clear enough. ]
You sure you and him aren't related? 'Cause you and him could be brothers, easy. Especially like this.
[Oh, he notices the way Bones looks him up and down, the way he licks his lips.
Kirk laughs as the mask vanishes again, leaving the young Kirk there again to be seen. It's something he's still working on keeping up, he wasn't bad at it, but he still needed to practice keeping it up when he wasn't thinking about it. Masking didn't come as naturally to him as compelling did.
Maybe that says something.]
I mean, we're both from the North, who knows, maybe distantly, but no. I think I subconsciously made my mask look more like Edgin or something.
[He knows it doesn't work that way, but there.. has to be an explanation.]
Next season is animal forms, won't lie, excited to fly. Maybe you can help me with that, hm?
Pretty sure that ain't how it works, but what do I know.
[ I definitely haven't nailed down what I want Bones' mask to be, but he's not the best at Blue Court and mostly uses it to hide when he's tired, so. Like Jim, Gold Court skills came easier than Blue, but he doesn't use those much either. His identity is pretty set -- this is who he wants to be, despite everything.
Jim on the other hand, damn. Who knew he could get more attractive. Founders give him strength. He rolls his eyes at Kirk's easy confidence -- it might prove to be misplaced, but Jim knows himself better than anyone. Maybe it'll work out. ]
You're sure you're flyin', huh? I guess if you do, I could teach you a thing or two.
Yeah, but not sure why I decided I needed to age a decade. Still hot at least.
[He doesn't sound pressed about aging a decade, there wasn't much he needed to do or look like to be different. He was happy with who he was, it felt right, but the aging... that was strange. Because looking in the mirror... it felt more right than looking at the face he has now. Like he's too young.
It was weird.
But he nods.]
You best believe I'm looking to you for flying advice. You and Edgin.
[He thinks about it for a second and looks even more resolute.]
And I have to fly. I mean.. maybe it's the whole other life and being in space of all places, but... it feels like I'm meant to be closer to the stars than down here..
Maybe you're supposed to be "wise beyond your years."
[ He says that with clear sarcasm, obviously meaning you're sure as hell not, Jim. But sometimes masks really are like that. And Bones knows Jim has suffered, despite not knowing all the details. Maybe there's some truth under his sarcasm. Maybe. ]
Wouldn't surprise me. If you and me really were supposed to be up there in the stars, then flying's as close as it gets.
[ That he'll help Jim learn to fly goes without saying. He wraps that arm around Jim's waist and pulls him flush against his side. It'd be a kind gesture except he's about to tease him. ]
I'm thinkin'.... hummingbird? Sparrow? Maybe, ooh, a cardinal! Or a peacock. That'd suit you.
Edited (sorry this is the last one) 2024-02-27 03:44 (UTC)
Or maybe I'm supposed to know how hot I could have been.
[He laughs, clearly something a little more self deprecating than one might expect from him. But it's gone as fast as it comes and he's back on the bird thing, not giving it any thought why the idea of being wise beyond his years makes him sad. Maybe because in whatever life they will have or had he didn't get to be...
Jim is quick to wrap an arm around the man's shoulders and lean against him, smiling while he does because it was so easy with Bones. With him he doesn't feel touch starved. Maybe because they often were touching when around each other.]
As pretty as a peacock as I am, I don't think they fly fly, they like throw themselves a certain distance.
You mean how hot you're gonna be. You know some people mask 24/7, right?
[ Hmmm, did he really just say that? About Jim being hot? Don't worry about it. He saw that flash of insecurity and pain, so of course he has to shut it down. Plus it doesn't feel awkward to admit to Jim, as long as the kid doesn't fixate on it. Like this touching thing -- it's normal. It feels normal. He's not gonna question it, just focus on the bird thing so he doesn't feed Jim's ego anymore than his due. ]
They glide, Jim. And they like shakin' their big asses to get people's attention. I think you and them got a lot more in common than just your good looks.
Oh, ho? You liked that much huh? I'll keep that in mind.
[He gives Bones a grin, because he will have to focus on getting better at his mask if Bones was going to like it that much. He could do that, mask as his hotter older self for the man. He would gladly.
It would be on his priority list to get better at that.
Laughing at Bones, he shakes his head.]
Gliding isn't good enough, I need to fly, be a speck up in the sky I get so far up there. Though, has my ass shaking got your attention yet, Bones? Only good if it gets you the person you're shaking it for.
Oh, hush. It makes you look like Edgin. Maybe you oughta be thanking him for your good looks.
[ Not that that makes any sense, but teasing Jim has never had to make sense. Bones just... it feels right. And he still has his arm around Jim's waist, so he certainly doesn't think Jim looks bad like this. Far from it. ]
Oh, yeah. [ Dripping with sarcasm. ] How'd you know I had a thing for peacock bullshit? I'm definitely into you waving that thing in front of me.
[ He shoves him playfully, elbowing him in the side with a nudge. ]
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[ A promotion in the field... Founders, what the hell were they getting into? And why were they in space? He'd almost have expected Jim to remember everything he had, but that doesn't make sense. Why would he? It felt real though. It had to be real. If Jim didn't remember them meeting, then maybe he just hadn't remembered it yet.
It makes sense, in a completely nonsensical way, that these memories are something starring the both of them. Bones hand't even considered the alternative—his first memory starred him and Jim. Was meeting the catalyst? ]
Memories? Like from some—
[ He pauses, because Jim offers the idea of a 'past life' and that would make sense, except for the part where they were in space. And the technology seemed... nothing like this. He's a little curious about who else could be sharing memories like this, but ultimately they have to figure their own shit out, Bones doesn't give gossip too much credit. ]
Well, I sure as hell hope it ain't the future, because things would have to change pretty fucking drastically for you and me to end up in the fucking sky.
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He shakes his head.]
I don't know about that, I--I... I don't think it's our future so much as maybe a future life? In which I still call you Bones and I'm still Jim Kirk.. which is what seems wild to me. Because I don't think I was a vampire, so how was I still me?
[It would be one thing to look different, to have a different name, but to be exactly the same? To be himself still? But he couldn't have been a vampire.. sure everything was color coded correctly (some medical people were in white and silver, some people in red, gold, and blue, but..) but how could he have that level of a allergic reaction if he was a vampire? To be that winded, to feel his heart racing, blood pumping... "We got to keep your heartrate down" Bones had said as much.
No, he had been alive. ]
I don't know how we get there, but I just.. Maybe this is the something that's drawn us in together, you said you felt we met before, that you knew me. Well, maybe this is it. And that's what's most confusing, how right and real it feels to me.
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If they were meant to meet in the future, or meant to meet in another life, what did that mean? If they had the same names, and the same faces, what could it be but some strange life they couldn't escape from? Certainly Bones could think of worse things for fate to pull him towards then Jim Kirk, but it's all really confusing and enough to rock a guy's worldview a bit. ]
I definitely wasn't a vampire. It feels different, then and now. I was alive.
[ Which is weird to notice, but also adds some credibility to the chance of it being something in the future. What happens to vampires when they die? Do they get reborn? Fuck, he doesn't want to think about that, it's so damn philisophical. There was no point in dwelling on that—they couldn't change it, whatever it was.
But they could focus on the here and now. ]
I felt it. Wantin' to learn more about you, feeling... you know, like I can talk to you. I know this is it, I've just been denyin' it.
[ He shakes his head. He sounds so ridiculous. But the possibility of their meeting feels inevitable. Getting memories of chasing Jim around only seemed to confirm what Leonard felt when they first met—this man is going somewhere, and I wanna follow him. Even if it meant chasing him down halls or finding out more about why he had a split lip and blood all over his clothes. Even if he was a brat who liked having his neck bit.
Of course, instead of all that, he says: ]
Really are stuck together, huh? If that's another life, or the future... somethin' tells me, this is it.
[ This friendship, whatever it was, was it. ]
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Except not everyone was here or at least the same, Spock and Uhura weren't here, same with Scotty and Chekov... it was just him and Bones. Just him and a man he felt fond of in the memory just the same as he does now but with more.. more time, more growth? Even if he was also super irritated with him at the time.
His head pops up at the admittance though, eyebrows going up, because Bones has kind of admitted something similar, but to full on admit he felt that something too? That Jim wasn't crazy in feeling the pull of.. destiny or some weird crap.
But Bones felt it too, that need to know the other, the instant draw and almost.. comfort to talk to one another. That he's been denying it but not anymore. Not with this shared memory. It wasn't a shared dream, like what happened earlier, no, this was two separate dreams that coincided in their memory.
And then Bones is giving voice to what he's felt for a while. That this is it, this friendship is it, something big and important and just it.]
I told you, I set my sights on you, Bones, you can't even get rid of me in another life. [He gives a delighted sort of laugh and smile, bright as sunshine, right now his death wasn't even on his mind, the fact he isn't alone in this was something worth feeling bright over.]
So, you got promoted and I eventually become Captain, sounds like we'll be working close together, make a good team even.
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May as well be a thunderstorm in July for how much I can't avoid you, kid.
[ Jim's smiling like the sun and Bones knows that warmth in his chest isn't from frustration. He's already said way more than he's told most people, always shared parts of himself that he never shares.
He'll freak out about the implications later. For now, hearing Jim laugh and seeing him smile would just have to be good enough. ]
"Chief Medical Officer." [ He says it like he's quoting someone, because he is. At the same time, he's proud of the title. It may not mean much of anything to him, but it's a point of pride to know he was still good at his job in whatever weird future life they had. ] Are we in the military or something? One where everybody wears blue or red?
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He even chuckles at the metaphor. ]
Chief huh? Then we'll be working real close together. And... I don't know. We all had titles.. Captain, cadet, lieutenant, they spoke like they were giving orders..
[Kirk gets really serious, bringing his hand to his chin as he recalls things, brows pinched a little in thought.]
I think maybe? I mean, the captain, Pike, he was in Gold, so were a few others. So it's not just red and blue. I remember all three colors being in my other memory too.
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[ Another roll of eyes, but there's some comfort in that too. Jim getting serious, the use of titles and order... At least these other memories have things in common with their real lives. Maybe that's not so bad then. Whatever it was, maybe it would be fine.
It'll be a puzzle to put together, something to pull apart and make sense of. ]
Hold on, I thought you said you were captain? Who's Pike?
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[It was confusing for him too because in his other memory he is captain, he was responsible for everyone and everything that was happening, he had to save his crew even at the.. sacrifice of his life.]
I become Captain at some point, but I'm not sure when.. I'm captain in my other memory the one where.. Well, you saw it. A warped nightmare version of it. You weren't actually there, in the real memory.
[He swallows and feels a heavy weight on his chest again at the thought.]
I don't know where you were. Hopefully somewhere safer than a dying ship.
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Still, talk of the dream sobers Bones up pretty quick. If he had to guess, any situation where Jim dies probably means Bones couldn't stop him from doing something stupid or reckless. That, or maybe he just wasn't on board? He'd guess he was dead maybe, but who can say? Had Jim's sacrifice for the crew included him? Could he really think that sacrificing himself would be worth it?
It's a can of worms he doesn't wanna open too much. ]
That's a real shit memory.
[ Not the worst way to die, if he's being honest—saving other people is the best reason to, at times, but if you ask Bones he'd rather save people and avoid an untimely death. He still doesn't know Jim well enough to guess what he was thinking. All he can do is bring an arm around Jim's shoulders, pulling him into a half hug. ]
Hey, at least in this life, you're not gonna die permanently. Us vampires get to cheat death.
[ It's pretty great!! Except for the shitty parts, but Bones is trying to stay positive here. Which is how you know he cares about Jim—he's a real negative Nancy with most people. ]
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He knows he would feel the same way about Bones and saving him. The relief he felt when Spock told him the ship and crew were saved. It was terrifying but worth it. And what a weird feeling that was, but he can still feel that mix of emotions in his chest when he thinks about it.
It makes his Becoming something he's dreading.. to die again.
Again.
The half hug is surprising, but he returns it, leaning into the hug and resting his head against him.]
Yeah.. yeah you're not wrong.
[He gives Bones a cheeky smile, more to cover up that the idea of dying in general scares him.]
Plus, I get to bother my favorite doctor all the time. I'm looking forward to it.
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Clearly, death can't stop them
because they can't read. ]Yeah, lucky me.
[ Bones rolls his eyes but he gives Jim a squeeze. A physical reassurance if nothing else. It's all he can do, when there's so much uncertainty. He doesn't know what any of this. means, what a shared life in space might have to do with where they are now.
But an eternity with his friend—maybe even his best friend, even if they're both vampires, well. That sounds pretty nice, he has to admit. ]
Better not get injured just so you can come see me. I have office hours, you know.
[ As if Jim needed office hours to invade Leonard's space. Psh. ]
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And the fact that Bones barely tried to push him away before also giving in to this feeling, before giving into the pull between them? It just made Jim want to stick to him even more.
Bones wasn't doing himself any favors being nice to this idiot, he would never get rid of him at this rate.]
Uh-huh, office hours, we both know those don't apply to me. [Grin.]
But just for you, I won't go looking for trouble, I'll let it find me instead.
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[ But he smiles as he says it, somehow warmed by the proximity, even knowing what a headache Jim Kirk can be. He can't imagine getting rid of him now, can't imagine not having him in his life even with just the few things he remembers before. Something about this kid, underneath all his bluster, was worth keeping around.
He doesn't even deny the thing about his office hours. Those never apply to the people Bones actually likes.
They were always going to meet, whether in this life or the next. Strange fucking feeling, but at least they weren't dealing with it alone. ]
Try and do it for your hot maker too—even if somethin' tells me trouble an' you are old friends.
[ He elbows Jim in the side, playful more than anything. Oh, you're in trouble now, Jim. If you've made it to Bones actually getting playful, there's simply no escaping him. ]
And if you tell Edgin I said he's hot, I'll find my biggest needle to stab you with next time you end up in the infirmary!
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He laughs when Bones calls him and trouble old friends. Honestly, he likes Bones being playful, it felt right.]
Of course I try to stay out of trouble for my hot maker, and I promise, I won't tell him. Though he would be flattered to know.
[A pause and then he's grinning this time, like the cat who got the canary]
Wanna see my mask? I'm told it looks like a slightly younger, less sad Edgin.
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He's just a friend! Like you.
[ That's not a "we'll never have sex," in fact it's the opposite considering how Bones feels about Edgin, but don't worry about it. If they're just messing around, then that's good. It feels nice. Bones hasn't really had a friend like Jim... ever, if he thinks about it. Maybe in that other life? But it was Jim, wasn't it? ]
Sure, let's see it. Though for the record, Edgin pulls off sad really well.
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[He gives Bones a wink before taking a deep breath and focusing. It's obvious he's not quite got masking down as easily as some, still learning it and all. It was so easy to do it drunk but it was harder sober.
But after a moment of focusing he goes from being 21 to 30 something in age, his hair a little longer and his eyes bright human blue. He looks aged for sure, like he has life experience and weight behind his eyes and in the lines of his skin, not Edgin levels, but there is a similarity that's more noticeable now that he's a little older looking. But he's still undeniably Kirk.]
There, I think I got it. What do you think?
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Stupid Jim making him think about Edgin. The mask certainty doesn't help with that. Bones watches the change, curious despite his fake qualms. Jim is getting the hang of these things, it looks like. ]
Not bad.
[ Understatement. It's uncanny. It hadn't really occurred to Bones to think about the resemblance, but seeing it now it's undeniable. He knows they're not father and son, but damn. Is this why Bones is attracted to both of them? Is he weak for blonds with thick eyebrows and nice lips? Jim looks older than he was in his memories, too. The age looks good on him. Not that Bones will admit that.
His stare, and the way he looks Jim up and down, maybe even licks his lips, should make his real thoughts clear enough. ]
You sure you and him aren't related? 'Cause you and him could be brothers, easy. Especially like this.
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Kirk laughs as the mask vanishes again, leaving the young Kirk there again to be seen. It's something he's still working on keeping up, he wasn't bad at it, but he still needed to practice keeping it up when he wasn't thinking about it. Masking didn't come as naturally to him as compelling did.
Maybe that says something.]
I mean, we're both from the North, who knows, maybe distantly, but no. I think I subconsciously made my mask look more like Edgin or something.
[He knows it doesn't work that way, but there.. has to be an explanation.]
Next season is animal forms, won't lie, excited to fly. Maybe you can help me with that, hm?
[He's just so damn certain he's gonna be a bird.]
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[ I definitely haven't nailed down what I want Bones' mask to be, but he's not the best at Blue Court and mostly uses it to hide when he's tired, so. Like Jim, Gold Court skills came easier than Blue, but he doesn't use those much either. His identity is pretty set -- this is who he wants to be, despite everything.
Jim on the other hand, damn. Who knew he could get more attractive. Founders give him strength. He rolls his eyes at Kirk's easy confidence -- it might prove to be misplaced, but Jim knows himself better than anyone. Maybe it'll work out. ]
You're sure you're flyin', huh? I guess if you do, I could teach you a thing or two.
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[He doesn't sound pressed about aging a decade, there wasn't much he needed to do or look like to be different. He was happy with who he was, it felt right, but the aging... that was strange. Because looking in the mirror... it felt more right than looking at the face he has now. Like he's too young.
It was weird.
But he nods.]
You best believe I'm looking to you for flying advice. You and Edgin.
[He thinks about it for a second and looks even more resolute.]
And I have to fly. I mean.. maybe it's the whole other life and being in space of all places, but... it feels like I'm meant to be closer to the stars than down here..
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[ He says that with clear sarcasm, obviously meaning you're sure as hell not, Jim. But sometimes masks really are like that. And Bones knows Jim has suffered, despite not knowing all the details. Maybe there's some truth under his sarcasm. Maybe. ]
Wouldn't surprise me. If you and me really were supposed to be up there in the stars, then flying's as close as it gets.
[ That he'll help Jim learn to fly goes without saying. He wraps that arm around Jim's waist and pulls him flush against his side. It'd be a kind gesture except he's about to tease him. ]
I'm thinkin'.... hummingbird? Sparrow? Maybe, ooh, a cardinal! Or a peacock. That'd suit you.
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[He laughs, clearly something a little more self deprecating than one might expect from him. But it's gone as fast as it comes and he's back on the bird thing, not giving it any thought why the idea of being wise beyond his years makes him sad. Maybe because in whatever life they will have or had he didn't get to be...
Jim is quick to wrap an arm around the man's shoulders and lean against him, smiling while he does because it was so easy with Bones. With him he doesn't feel touch starved. Maybe because they often were touching when around each other.]
As pretty as a peacock as I am, I don't think they fly fly, they like throw themselves a certain distance.
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[ Hmmm, did he really just say that? About Jim being hot? Don't worry about it. He saw that flash of insecurity and pain, so of course he has to shut it down. Plus it doesn't feel awkward to admit to Jim, as long as the kid doesn't fixate on it. Like this touching thing -- it's normal. It feels normal. He's not gonna question it, just focus on the bird thing so he doesn't feed Jim's ego anymore than his due. ]
They glide, Jim. And they like shakin' their big asses to get people's attention. I think you and them got a lot more in common than just your good looks.
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[He gives Bones a grin, because he will have to focus on getting better at his mask if Bones was going to like it that much. He could do that, mask as his hotter older self for the man. He would gladly.
It would be on his priority list to get better at that.
Laughing at Bones, he shakes his head.]
Gliding isn't good enough, I need to fly, be a speck up in the sky I get so far up there. Though, has my ass shaking got your attention yet, Bones? Only good if it gets you the person you're shaking it for.
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[ Not that that makes any sense, but teasing Jim has never had to make sense. Bones just... it feels right. And he still has his arm around Jim's waist, so he certainly doesn't think Jim looks bad like this. Far from it. ]
Oh, yeah. [ Dripping with sarcasm. ] How'd you know I had a thing for peacock bullshit? I'm definitely into you waving that thing in front of me.
[ He shoves him playfully, elbowing him in the side with a nudge. ]
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